Where have I been?

I have been looking for work.

Praying the best for my children.

Wondering how I will pay the bills.

Spending time with myself.

Falling apart.

Being offered a job at where I was.

Preparing for a new year of teaching.

Being excited.

Looking forward to a new year of fresh faces to teach.

Being told the contract offer was a mistake.

Meeting me teacher that took my room.

Turned down at my volunteer offers at work.

Being kept on for this last school year.

Having no assignment yet. 

Offer to help where needed turned down, again.

Being forgotten.

Feeling safe alone, no one to disappointment.

Trauma of abandonment and emotional neglect surfacing again.

Trusting just my time alone with me.

Wondering if the last doctor visit killed the cancer virus.

Having a symptom.

Wondering why most the promises made to me are broken or fake.

Being vocal with the wrongs that have been done to me.

Accepting my part in what has been done to me.

Wondering what my next step will be.

Wondering if I will see the signs revealed to me so I will know my way.