January 3, 2019

So many people are talking about new resolutions for 2019, how 2018 was horrible.  I will not dispute either of those topics. 

Some people may need new resolutions and some people may look back in horror.  I think I have finally learned that doing both those things, for me, keeps me in a negative mind set.  Being in a negative mind set is not healthy. Not for me. 

Looking back, non emotionally, and finding the good in what happened changes your outlook. 
I thought about sharing some of those here.  I deleted what I started to write.  I felt the creep of negativity coming to my mind.

You can think about what happened that you did not like and dwell there, or you can look at what happened as a learning experience and find some good in what happened.  I used to have that attitude and handled the downs so much better when I did. 

If you read back in my archive you will see how I did not have that mindset.  I had a "Oh woe is me" attitude.  "How could this happen to me?!"  Well, life happens. Biggest thing I perhaps have learned is that if you don't feel like yourself and happy with how you feel, it is not the fault of someone or something else.  It is usually how we react and keep reacting. 

I am not saying to react or to close your emotions off.  Not at all, I would explode if I did that.  React, it is a normal response.  Try your best not to react mindlessly though.  That is not good. 
After your reaction happens, start calming yourself as best you can and then when the event has passed and you can calm to a logical point, stop and think. 
1. Was my reaction warranted?
2. Was my reaction over the top or not enough?
3. Was my reaction correct?
4. Am I calm now to think about all this?
5. What did I learn about myself?
a. What set me off?
b. Why did it set me off?
c. What can I do to not react negatively?

This is one think I have been really working on last year and will continue to work on in the future.