I figured out last night that I have spent 25 or more days in the hospital since March 26, 2013. The day before that I was rushed to the hospital because I was in excruciating pain and dying. I didn't know I was sick. I thought it was just stress, stress that caught up with me. Since then my life has been saved medically. I am writing this on the second night in the hospital from the third and maybe last surgery on my cellphone.
The physical recovery has gone well up to now. I have another 8-12 months to full recovery physically. The emotional recovery has not been so easy since devisting news to my two children and I this past September 2013. That will take longer to recover from, if at all for the kids and will leave a much deeper scar on my kids than anyone can imagine. I see the effects everyday. Everyday.
I want to say thank you to everyone that has been there emotionally and physically for my kids and I. I for one would not be able to move forward at all with out your gentle nudges.
Hopefully I go home from the hospital later today to continue my physical recovery. I will continue to try and get the kids into counseling, which they need, and I will continue with my counseling and divorce care classes so I can try and heal and hopefully learn how to help the kids.
Being unemployed needs to be remedied too. For myself and the daughter. I have started my life over so many times. I have just so much less now to dig up from my core to stand with. I stopped keeping track of my cat lives a long time ago. I'm tired of being told it's all my fault and other horrible things throughout my life. I do the best I can with the skills ib was given to live. In 4 days I will have s birthday too. Maybe it will go by and ib won't notice.
It's 4:33am on Valentine's Day. I pray everyone had the best one possible.
No comments:
Post a Comment